A couple of weeks ago Elizabeth and I visited my grandparents in Bedford, Texas. It turned out to be the final time that I would see my grandfather. It was a sad occasion, but did have some very wonderful and positive out comes. There’s a lot that can be said about the adventure that occurred that weekend. Below is a quick story about that weekend.
Elizabeth and I knew that my grandfather wasn’t doing too well. I had received sporadic calls from my dad that mentioned that grandpa’s health was declining and with updates about how grandma was handling the situation. Fortunately, we got a limited understanding of the situation. Also, my understanding has been somewhat limited by an inability to do much about any complicated situations in Bedford. Ultimately, we didn’t realize the full circumstances of what grandmother and grandfather were going through.
We got our first glimpse into the situation from an initial call to my grandmother to find out if it would be ok to visit that weekend. She said that it would and sounded very excited that we would be coming to see them both. When we arrived she was very happy to see us and we used the first few minutes to get an update of grandpa’s situation. Very soon we were on our way to the famous family favorite - Luby’s cafeteria. Over dinner we got a better description of the situation and started to learn the story of my grandfather’s quick decline in health
Recently, my grandmother had moved my grandfather in to a hospice center. He suffered from Parkinson’s and due to the disorder could not swallow food. A stomach tube was inserted to provide him with nourishment. However, soon after the feeding tube was inserted my grandfather started to show signs of discomfort. The tube was then removed, and he was entered into a hospice facility.
The night that we saw him, he was fast a sleep. He looked peaceful, and deep in thought. As we looked on, we would see small movements of his cheeks and eyebrows as he dreamt. We spent approximately thirty minutes watching him with grandmother. As we left the room, grandmother bent over and gently kissed his head. She smoothed out his hair and then headed toward the doorway. I stopped by the bed and softly wished grandpa a good night.
The next morning we received a phone call from my dad informing us that my grandfather had passed away during the early morning hours. Elizabeth and I decided that it would be best to stick with the plans we had originally made with my grandmother, calling her in the afternoon to arrange an opportunity to spend more time with her. Her morning hours were scheduled to spend time with my Aunt Elise.
We called later that afternoon and were told to come over. When we got there we were excited to see that there were more cars in the driveway. My grandmother met us at the front door and ushered us in the house. The other cars turned out to belong to my Aunt Elise, her daughter Lynda, and Lynda’s husband Darren. This meeting was especially important to me because I had never met my aunt or any of my cousins. Relationships between my dad and aunt had become strained sometime around the marriage of my parents. It appears that no one from the younger generations knows exactly what happened. Fortunately, I got the sense that many of the folks in the younger generation are ready to establish positive relationships. Although the funeral was a sad occasion because of the loss of a loved one, it was a happy occasion because it brought so many of us together for the first time.
It was great to meet them all. Although it was a little awkward, we had a great time getting to know our family members. The next day Elizabeth and I got to meet my cousins Randy and Karen. Meeting my aunt and my cousins was a great experience. I think the excitement was mutual. Following the funeral we exchanged contact information. I’m sure that we’ll be in touch in the near future, definitely any time that we visit grandma.
Fortunately, one of grandma’s sisters was able to make a visit to see her and to spend some time at grandma’s. After that, it was my understanding that she would be visiting her other sister in New Jersey. After that, maybe she’ll be interested in visiting Wichita?
My grandfather’s passing was also an opportunity to learn more about him and the family in general. I learned that my great grandfather immigrated to America after World War I. The German economy was a wreck, causing many Germans to make the long journey to America for a better life.
My grandfather came through Ellis Island. During the voyage he became sick with a cold and was extremely worried that he would be rejected from entering America because he was sick, especially given the immigration concerns over immigrants carrying epidemic causing diseases. Fortunately, my great grandfather was allowed to enter and settle in the US. He and his brother settled in the New York area. After getting established, they sent for their wives and children still living in the Germany.
My grandfather was born after the family settled in America. At a young age he was a sickly child. Eventually, his health improved as he grew older. When World War II broke out he was not accepted (not sure if he was drafted or volunteered) in the military. It is my understanding that a health inspection found problems with his feet.
Fortunately, my grandfather and great uncle did get accepted to work at a small airline company. The company was American Airlines. At that time many airline start-up companies existed and competition was fierce. My great uncle served as a pilot and my grandfather was a mechanic.
My grandfather and grandmother met through their parents. Their first date was to go bowling. My grandmother says that she was so nervous that she almost threw the bowling ball back into the observation area and not towards the pins. Things must have gone well at the first date though. Sometime later they got hitched and started a family.
My grandfather later transferred to the DFW area. At that position he eventually became the head mechanic for American Airline’s DFW hub. He was well respected by his co-workers and many had stories about him having a great sense of humor at work.
We all got to know small elements of the whole man. The funeral brought together people from all elements of his life. It was interesting to see the fuller portrait of the man I knew as grandpa. I look forward to learning more about my family and especially getting to know my cousins.
